It can be said that nothing can prepare you for the ups and downs of parenthood. The surprise moments when you see the ‘first’ of something delightful, or when you encounter negative behaviour you thought you’d never have to deal with; it’s all part of the job. Sometimes you need help with the know-how of parenting. That’s where my parent counselling in North Vancouver can come in handy.
Perhaps you’ve tried scouring the internet for parenting advice, or searched for books on the topic. Getting a wide view of what’s helped other people can certainly be useful. But you may find yourself in moments where your parenting dilemma is so specific, you just don’t know what to do.
Do you punish, or do you soothe a child who clearly needs help? But what kind of help? Or perhaps you’re not sure how to apply parenting strategies the way other parents have. And then there all those opinions people (even strangers!) can be so eager to give, even though they don’t know 1% about you, or your kid.
Parenting can be tricky. You may need an unbiased expert to step in. With professional parent coaching services, you can expect tailored advice for your child’s unique situation.
Take care of yourself by releasing your own emotions about parenting struggles: your kids need it as much as you do
Sometimes, you need a safe environment where you can release the stress that you’re experiencing as a parent. It can be about you just as much as it can be about your child. Parenting counselling can help.
When you come to terms with what’s bothering you, your kids will sense it, and it can then affect your relationship with them. If at home you find that you are:
- Constantly losing your temper, especially over small things, when you didn’t intend to (and feel guilty afterwards).
- Over-punishing, with little to no effect (but maybe you do it anyway).
- Feeling resentful about being a single parent who has to bear the parenting burden alone.
- Fighting battles with your partner, or ex-partner, about parenting choices or roles.
- Not looking forward to spending time with your kids, or tending to their needs.
- Hiding away from family responsibilities.
Or other similar symptoms, it may be time to see a parenting coach, and to take care of YOU for once.
Through these sessions, you’ll also be able to strategize with an expert on how to de-stress with kids at home, when you’re not in a therapist’s office.
Use parent counselling to overcome barriers in your relationship with your child
Whether or not you have a knack for being mom or dad, struggles with your parent-child relationship are likely inevitable. If they’re not happening at age 3, you must have had a miracle child, or you’ll just have extra to deal with at age 13!
Of course, I’m joking. But the point is, as your kids grow older, they develop their own personalities. Sooner than you know it, their world is not only influenced by you and their immediate surroundings. They will be influenced by TV, by their friends, their friends’ families, their teacher, and more.
Sometimes, kids are just being kids. But other times, problem behaviours can present a seemingly insurmountable barrier to overcome. It can be like a wall has gone up between your child and yourself. For some, the wall could be between you and your stepchildren.
Functioning as a so-called, ‘normal’ family may have stopped. You may not be able to speak to each other without an argument ensuing. Or, if it’s not outright defiance, you may find a frequent undertone of resentment in your conversations with each other.
And all of this doesn’t stop at the parent-child relationship. It can affect the way your spouse and you interact. It can elicit those annoying opinions from strangers or family members we talked about earlier. And eventually, it can affect you in other parts of your life. How do you concentrate at work if you’re worried about your child all day?
Parent counselling can help with all of the above. It’s not just about paying for someone to talk to (in case you’ve been told that, or thought of it that way). I use varied approaches to help you process and heal through the issues you’re facing, all in a professional way. Whether it’s talk therapy, sharing information about the latest research on parenting, role playing, or using expressive means like art and sand play, the ultimate goal is to to help you heal through the issues you’re facing internally.
Learn parenting skills based on research and informed practice
While there is no true instruction manual for parenting, during our time together, we will discuss effective parenting strategies to try with your child at home. The advantage of working with a parenting coach on these skills is mainly with the years of research done in this field.
In addition to helping you take a look at the bigger picture of your parenting and family relationships, we will also be discussing parenting life skills such as:
- How to reduce your stress in your daily life, which could in turn decrease your parenting stresses.
- Increasing awareness of dysfunctional relational patterns with your children and the negative impact they can have on your parent-child dynamic. These negative patterns also likely apply to your other family relationships, and can be addressed at the same time.
- Identifying activities that bring regulation to your entire family, and allow you to have fun together.
- Achieving balance between activities and downtime to achieve a calm and steady family environment.
Plus more. Of course, the skills you’ll learn with me will depend entirely on your own family’s situation. These can vary from case to case.
Get in-depth help for your parent-child relationship by seeing a parenting coach
It may be that the way you were raised is affecting your parenting. Or perhaps there are some personal struggles that are making it hard for you to focus on your child when you’re with them. Whatever it is, a family therapist with parent counselling skills helps you get to the bottom of it, and find a solution to it.
I encourage you to give me a call today, and we can schedule a free, 20 minute phone consultation to find out if I can be of help to you.